Sunday, January 3, 2016

Looking Forward, Looking Back....

So, it's 2016, everyone is making themselves promises in the form of resolutions.  I'm not; resolutions are made to be broken.  I'll do what I need to, when I need to.  Or when I decide to, whichever way it goes, it's fine.  So long as things get done.

I'd rather use the New Year to reflect on what I learnt in the past year.  Far more beneficial than making a bunch of promises I am never going to keep.  I can see where I came from, and that I did in fact achieve something.  Far better for my mental and emotional health than looking back and seeing all the areas I failed in (or thought I failed in).

So, as we move forward into 2016, let us look back over 2015, and see what I discovered about myself and the world.

1. I am still strong.  All the crap that saw me start this blog may have *almost* broken me, but it didn't.  Recovery was slow, and is continuing, but I survived.

2. Amy Schumer can catch a dick anytime she wants.  I don't know who she is, but good for her.

3. That there IS light out there. My issue was that I was looking for a sun, when I should have been looking for stars.

4. Other people just plain don't matter.  I knew this before, but this year really drove it home.  No matter who they are, no matter how much you love them/they love you, YOU are #1.  If you aren't happy, something has to change.

5. Racism is getting worse in this country.  Where once it was almost hidden, except from those who were targets, or like-minded souls, it is now everywhere.  And it is seen by a lot of people as justifiable!!

6. I found out why I bruise so badly at times.  I have a platelet disfunction disorder; a particular platelet in my blood doesn't work properly, but only occassionally.  It has no specific name, which is irritating, but at least I can say 'There IS something real here'.  I also know what medications I cannot take, and that giving blood is not a good idea.

7. I also found out that, while there are a lot of arsehats out there, there are also good people.  Still.  Coming on the road has exposed me to a lot of  different people, and I have made some great friends.  I've also met an incredible amount of tossers.

8. I really, really do not like driving.  I remember now why I put off getting a licence for so long.  I despise driving.  Second-guessing tossers is not my idea of a good time.  And there is something about a 1+ ton metal box that can turn the most reasonable human being into a complete wanker.  And I am supposed to thing for me, and them?!

9. I've become even more convinced that there is still magic in the world.  I don't care that we can explain the auroras, fairie rings, thunder and lightning through science.  I don't care that whitecaps aren't Neptune driving his horses hard.  If believing in magic makes me happy (which it does) I am going to do it.  Anyone who doesn't like it, can get stuffed.  So long as I don't hurt anyone, it's no-one's business but mine.